Writing Thank You Notes

Tips to help with those post funeral thank you cards

Sometimes the right words are difficult to find by during a time in one's life that is already overwhelming. At the same time, the support of many people helped you and your family -- from hospital staff to your kind neighbor. What do you write? In our short guide, we discuss five tips on how to make this process easier.
  • Keep a notepad nearby to list the people you might like to thank. Etiquette doesn't require that you thank everyone who attended the funeral or memorial service -- only the people who did something extra. Some suggestions are: the pastor/priest, any musicians, the funeral director, any hospice & medical staff who were especially caring, people who brought food, those who gave flowers or made charitable contributions, or anyone who assisted in the memorial service such as pallbearers or ushers.


  • Using a standard phrase can be helpful when writing thank you notes. A simple 1-3 sentences is all that is required. Here are a few examples:

    "Our family really appreciated your support during this difficult time."

    "We appreciate your thoughtful donation of __________ in honor of ______"

  • The funeral home can keep track of all flower donations, which can ensure you don't miss anyone. The guestbook is a a useful tool in building your list of people to thank.

  • Sending notes within 2-3 weeks after the service is ideal, though no one will be expecting timely delivery. Send them as you are able.

  • As you send the notes, draw strength from family and friends who are thinking of you.

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Have some additional ideas? Comment below. We always appreciate hearing from our readers.